`pain of living dead (go back »)

how was it feel like you are nothing? nothingness that kills you? feeling that no one needs you? bedridden and depends on other people's hand, it was so painfull knowing that you have to be a burden to other's, your disturbing them and the fact that other people cant understand you.The looks that kills striking on to your heart, you feel that a gray shadows haunt and torment and torture you till that last drop of blood counts... ~_~ i cant imagine how she feels and day by day i am starting to realize these simple words she say,,this simple words came from a simple 15 year old girl, she is diagnosed for her uncurable diseases, it was so pityful that she cant walk,write,speak fluently,and even eat. I experience a combination of intense sorrow and mercy for the girl. "what is my purpose of living?,i feel like i was alive and burrying  a casket  it was so painful, the pain of living dead she said". Her silent voice breaks my heart knowing that we have the same age.

Crying all day,asking why, is what builds her world,i want to save her and show her that someone cares, and also telling her that there is God always watching and guiding us.I need to be strong helping and encouraging her to be strong because everything happens for a reason and i need to hide my sympathy towards her to ease her suffering.

`life is so cruel,happy, but lonely,limits our counted. ~_~

_yiyori_